Gay Marriage Strategy

One of our archivists came across a newspaper celebrating Senate Bill 283, the precursor to Nevada's Gay Marriage bill. It struck a cord, causing me to search through some of the more obscure pieces we've inputted over the course of the past year. It took some time, but I finally found what I was looking for.

It appears S.B. 283 was one of many strings being pulled by author and notorious curmudgeon Paul Roberts. Roberts confessed, in a series of letters to a biologist friend living in Salt Lake City, that he'd been manipulating the process of gay rights legislation in subtle ways for years.

It started with a conversation with British journalist Mark Simpson in 1993, suggesting he should write about the recent trend of "Metrosexuality." The term caught on, and by the early 2000's, it was cool to be Metro, which Roberts describes as, "Three inches away from gay anyway".

Meanwhile, it seems as though Roberts pushed to get bills like S.B. 283 introduced to legislature, then inflamed gay rights activists, telling them not to be complacent and to fight for more, saying things like, "Do you want to be recognized by the IRS, or do you want people to realize homosexuality is a legitimate sexual preference, not a paraphilia."

Eventually, his rallying caught on, causing the gay population to fight like never before. After winning their recognition, they protected their right to marriage with a territorial fierceness. So much so, that same-sex couples no longer sought artificial insemination or surrogate parentage; becoming so obsessed with the idea of fidelity that they refused to let any third parties have a hand in their marriages.

In a few shot years there were nearly as many gay couples as straight. Roberts takes credit for this, as the "coolness" of metrosexuality led to uncounted numbers of impressionable and confused teens to seek same sex partners.

With so many same sex couples refusing to reproduce, the world's birthrate dropped drastically. Roberts' scientist friend heralds him as a savior, as he single handedly cowed the worlds overpopulation problem. Roberts refutes this, claiming he was just tired of there being so much traffic.